Pensees: Pirates Culture in the Church

Pirates Culture in the Church

Last night my daughter and I were having an after service daddy-daughter date at the Baskin Robbins (buy 1 sundae, get one free). I was a bit bemused that my fair-skin, red-headed princess was uttering low growls and bizarre “arrgh” noises in the middle of her conversation.

“What are you doing, Sweet Pea?”

“I’m talking pirate. It’s Talk Like Pirate Day.”

“Well, sweetheart, it is not Talk Like Pirate Day in the Bixby home.”

“But, Daddy, all the kids at church are doing it and we even played a game in Kids 4 Truth that mentioned it.” *see clarification*

“Fine. But tomorrow why don’t we celebrate Talk Like Thief Day or Talk Like Liar Day or Talk Like Swindler Day or Talk Like Criminal Day.”

“Daaaaaaaaadddyyyy! That’s silly. Of course not!”

“Well, what’s a pirate?”

“I dunno.”

She’s only six. Really doesn’t need to know what pirates are. And she’s never heard of “good” pirates. (She’s never heard of “Patch the Pirate.”) But the way of the world is to accommodate us to evil by teaching us to ignore the reality of definition. The world tampers with definition in one of two ways:

1. It replaces the word with a less convicting word.

When men have entered upon an ill practice, and proceeded in it, then their self-love prejudices them to approve of it. Men do not love to condemn themselves; they are prejudiced in their own favor, and in favor of whatever is found in themselves. Hence they will find out good names, by which to call their evil dispositions and practices; they will make them virtuous, or at least will make them innocent. Their covetousness they will call prudence and diligence in business. If they rejoice at another’s calamity, they pretend because they hope it will do him good, and will humble him. If they indulge in excessive drinking, it is because their constitutions require it. If they talk against and backbite their neighbor, they call it zeal against sin; it is because they would bear a testimony against such wickedness. If they set up their wills to oppose others in public affairs, then they call their willfulness conscience, or respect to the public good. — Thus they find good names for all their evil ways.

Men are very apt to bring their principles to their practices, and not their practices to their principles, as they ought.~ Jonathan Edwards

2. It turns the word itself into a toothless, cuddly toy. It makes hell a great big party. One reason why I did not like Harry Potter was simply because of the fact that it used some words like “sorcerer” as if their was such a thing as a good sorcerer. Even fantasy has to be accountable to reality to some extent. God hates witchcraft, He hates stealing, He hates piracy, and He certainly must be grieved when we thoughtlessly ape the world’s playful ways with outrageous sin.

What does a daddy do? I want my daughter to think, but I don’t want her to judge. I want her to love people and mix with her culture, but I don’t want her sponge up her culture. I want her to feel safe in church while consciously choosing not to mindlessly jump on the bandwagon. So the conversation continues:

“So, Sweet Pea, now that you know what a pirate is, do you think it makes sense to want to talk like them?”

“Not really. Want to try my Bubblegum Sundae?”

“No thanks” (stifling a “yuk!”), “but you know what, Sweetheart?”

“What?”

“I don’t like Bubblegum Sundaes anymore.”

“I can’t believe that! Try it! It’s so good! Yuuuummy! And it’s even better with the cherry, the strawberry syrup, and the whipped cream!!”

“Patience, I can hardly think of something I would rather not have. But you know what?”

“What?”

“I love being with red-headed six-year-olds that like Bubblegum Sundaes! And I don’t think you’re bad to like it! I don’t think I’m better than you because I don’t like it. I just think that when you taste more things and start to think about what you’re tasting you may be a bit more choosy. And, I’m hoping that by the time you’re a mommy that you like more things besides a Bubblegum Sundae. But in the meantime, when we go on a date, I’ll order something different!

“And that’s they way it is when we are with the people we love, Sweet Pea. We don’t have to order the same thing - or even like it — just because we are with them. And we don’t have to judge. But we can quietly hope that they start to like what we like and maybe even dislike what we dislike.”

“Uh, okay, Daddy. Daddy, did you notice that the American Girl catalogue came this week?”

Sigh. I’ve got the culture in my home too.