Pensees: Defending Chris Anderson’s Reputation

MEA CULPA.

I have issued a “formal” retraction here.

Greg, do you really think that you can get away with such a wimpy “mea culpa” after you, a renowned leader in the blogosphere, have so egregiously erred?

Sheesh! Have the blog-wars so calloused you that you can not appreciate the pain this has caused in our lives? Now from now on, Anderson I go to a conference Anderson is going to have to publish post-haste a disclaimer that he does not associate with me. This not only complicates life for him, but wounds me deeply.

I don’t think I’ll ever get over it, Greg.

This is very, very sad.

Ah! I see that your spirit was afflicting you even as I was posting my counter-challenge. Your retraction is good…

Healing may now commence.

Phew!

(I’m good with all this now, Greg. Hopefully Anderson is as gracious and mature as Bixby.)

After seeing Chris modeling for the T4G cameras, who would have doubted that Ligonier paid huge bucks to get him to come and model for their promos as well.

However, I figured it wasn’t Chris Anderson because he was on a four week vacation or something, I think, galavanting around the world.

Nice, Larry. I learned enough lessons via T4G to last me a lifetime, the most important of which is to sit like a man when taking notes, just in case somebody’s watching.

Now for Bob & Greg:

I appreciate the apology, Greg. Bob, your post is long on explaining & short on apologizing. And you’ve been so good at apologies in the past, too. I’m disappointed.

Anyway, I might forgive you guys. In fact, I probably will since you said so many nice things. First, however, I need to sort all of this out.

* While I was indeed “galavanting” for a time, I most certainly was not associating with new evangelicals. (Though I’ve recently been accused by Ben of having new evangelical & even liberal leanings. I think I have another apology coming. Three in one week would be very gratifying.)

* I wonder what’s more damaging: being accused of attending the conference or being associated with Bob? Hmmm….

* If being associated with Bob is the crux of the problem, how will being defended by him help? This whole thread is futile: in order to prove that I’m not his friend, Bob defends me like a friend. Great.

* Do you really think you can name 11 reformed fundamentalists, Bob? I’m calling your bluff. Do it. And BTW, Don Johnson gets to be the judge of whether they are (a) truly reformed and (b) truly fundamentalists.

Finally, what is it with fundamentalists & conferences? Don’t you guys ever work?

So who is going to come to the defense of Chris Metras and defend his reputation? He comes from a real fine family and I’d hate to see that tarnished. ( grinning out loud )

“Finally, what is it with fundamentalists & conferences? Don’t you guys ever work?”

So says the guy who by his own admission has been out galavanting for four weeks.

First, I was “galavanting” (notice the quotes, indicating irony) in Greece. It was a study tour; no fun at all; a sacrifice, even. And it was only for 12 days.

Second, your last comment didn’t sound like an apology. And, now that I think about it,does “mea culpa” count either? It’s the Latin equivalent of the flippant English term “my bad,” and it doesn’t really get to the heart of the issue. It’s almost dismissive, giving the appearance of an apology while avoiding the reality of damage done. Some counseling teacher (somewhere, some time) once said that the words “will you please forgive me?” are essential if an apology is to mean anything. So I’m willing to forgive you guys, but only if asked to do so. Specifically. By name.

Both names.

That’s what new thetic counselors say is right, and that’s what I require.

You know where to find me when you’re ready.

Mr. Chris Anderson,

First of all, it’s “nouthetic.”

Second, I mentioned you by name AND asked- no, BEGGED- humbly, for your forgiveness.

I am hurt, nay, BLEEDING at this hard-hearted rejection of a sincere plea for reconciliation.

I’m going to go back to my corner and weep bitterly, now.

I hope you’re happy.

maybe I’m out of the loop, but why was Bob supposed to be apologizing this time?

By the way, your arrogant WASP insensitivity to the expression of my ethnic Latin heritage further adds to my grief and sorrow.

:sob:

Oops. Greg, you did mention my names and the word “forgiveness.” I think I missed it because you were talking about me (3rd person) rather than to me (2nd person). Anyway, I’ll graciously overlook the slight, though I’m sure most counselors would advise against it. So here it is: I forgive you.

Greg, that is.

BTW, I know it’s nouthetic, you moron.

(Oops. That wasn’t nice. My bad.)

I don’t know what they taught you in “new thetic” counseling, but from what I know from nouthetic counseling is that one ought to listen well. You listened well enough to realize that I never offered an apology. What you missed was that I never felt like I needed to apologize. I did nothing wrong. Our friend Greg is the one who needed to apologize. All I did was to use the name Chris in referring to a guy named, well, “Chris.” So, it happened not to be you. Don’t be huffy about it.

Talk about hurt. I am unspeakably wounded now. I try to defend you and you, just to be politically safe, distance yourself from me by viciously spinning the whole scandal like I am the one who fomented it… Sheesh! If that isn’t typical good-ole-boy politics, I don’t know. (Except that I can’t figure out who the good old boys are.)

But I forgive you first. And may it be noted that if - IF - I have unwittingly, yet truly, sinned against you, I accept your forgiveness. But I forgave your first.

And “studying” in Greece for 12 days. Puh-leeze. I’ll bet you enjoyed it.

Ah! I wonder if you are bitter at me because you actually were there and I actually did unwittingly eat your desserts. Next time lose the trench coat, pal.

What’s the nouthetically-correct term for “denial”?

Isn’t tomorrow the only day of the week that you pastor guys really work? And aren’t you supposed to be “studying” to prepare for said work today? Conferences, study tours, marathons, man I’m in the wrong vocation.

Well, we’re still with you, Dr. Chris, in spite of Monsieur Bixby, and in spite of spelling “gallivanting” incorrectly. Oops, now I’ve identified myself as a spelling fundamentalist. And I’ve reformed your spelling. So am I a reformed fundamentalist, or just a friend of Chris’s?

Why do I have a penchant for being misunderstood?

I LOVE CHRIS ANDERSON!!!!

Ok.That’s off my chest.

Now, Beth, I don’t want to appear defensive, but since this whole thing has been misconstrued as a Chris against Bob debacle, I must say in my defense that I copied Chris - CHRIS - in his spelling of galavanting, but though it costs me dearly to defend him, let me do it once again:

“Galavant” is a legitimate variant of the more commonly used “gallivant.” Since that is the case, Chris is therefore justified to have assumed that “galavanting” is also a legitimate variant of “gallivant” and to mimic Larry’s usage (Larry started it) in full confidence. I am therefore justified to have assumed the same thing and and with full confidence mimic both Larry AND Chris.

So there.

But why am I defending Chris? This is sure to backfire.

Chris, Chris, Chris, Chris, Chris. How come everybody likes him? Just because he barely finished a marathon everybody treats him like he is a hero of fundamentalism.

Argh. And, btw, Keith. There is only one of us who has done marathons, trips to Greece, AND conferences, INCLUDING posing for promotionals. I won’t say who, but let the evidence speak for itself!

Now, back to work….

Well, if Larry said it, it must be right. Mea culpa, Bob! ;)

Galavanting away to finish ironing…

Bob, Bob, Bob.

You’re too kind, and I’ve punished you for your malicious misrepresentation of me long enough. I love you too, man. Almost as much as “falling back” an hour.

Actually, that’s probably an exaggeration; not much beats a 25-hour day. But I do love you. Really.

And I forgive you for starting this whole mess.

:-)

BTW, was that Keith who made an entire post without using the phrase “hyper-fundamentalist” even once? Wowzers.

I just want to affirm that all of the “alternative” spelling that has been going on over here is legitimate. I would know that! Just in case you all were wondering!

Joel

hyper-fundamentalist — who writes that? Wouldn’t it just be redundant?

Chris,

I’m not sure why I’m the one being accused of calling you a neo. That was Peter Masters, not me. Don’t shoot the messenger.

Anyway, in the debate you reference, “Dave,” “Don,” and Peter Masters are all on my side. That fact in itself ought to make you more than a little concerned, you poser fundy.

But I gotta say, you killed me with the reformed fundamentalists and Don line. But then no one ever said neos can’t be funny.